When bordom strikes w TMI
by bloody.silver.soul
Summary: it's just complete, funny randomness that i write when i'm really bored and have nothing else to do.
1. Chapter 1

**Wolf:** Hello everybody! This is me!

**Jace:** I think they got that.

**Wolf:** [Deadly glare]

**Simon:** just ignore him.

**Jace:** why? People like me more that you!

**Simon:** [gasp] that's not true!

**Clary:** actually Simon, if you look at other fanfictions and everything else, you are hardly ever in any of them. And if you are in it, it's only for a chapter. Sorry.

**Simon:** nobody loves me! [runs off and hides in emo corner]

**Alec:** um…I'm pretty sure that Isabelle loves Simon.

**Isabelle:** what! No I don't! I LIKE Simon. As in a crush.

**Simon:** [screaming from the emo corner] NOBODY LOVES ME! INCLUDING MY OWN GIRLFRIEND!

**Wolf:** wow….I kinda feel bad for Simon, but…

**Alec:** but what?

**Wolf:** but he does kinda deserves it. I mean, he DID date Isabelle and Maia at the same time.

**Maia:** ya, that wasn't cool.

**Isabelle:** why are you here? I thought you weren't in this story!

**Maia:** I thought so too, but obviously I am.

**Wolf:** yep! We're all here, like a big, happy family!

**Magnus:** what about me?

**Wolf:** ok, NOW we're all here like a big happy family!

**Simon:** nobody loves me! I might as well go die!

**Isabelle:** I'm better than you at everything werewolf!

**Maia:** you can't even cook!

**Jace:** oh, no she didn't!

**Isabelle&Maia:** SHUT UP JACE!

**Alec: **[runs by screaming, being chased by owls] why are there owls here? They aren't even in the book!

**Magnus:** hm, I thought the owls were all after Simon Cowell. He is the king of the beavers.

**Wolf:** like I said, one happy family!

**Jace:** if this is a HAPPY family, I would hate to see a really pissed off family.

**Magnus :** yes that would frightening. [shivers]

**Wolf:** alright, we're done here.

**Alec:** help me! [still running from owls]

**Magnus:** hey, is that Simon Cowell? [points off into the distance]

[the owls stop chasing Alec and fly off after Simon Cowell, who screams]

**Alec:** thank you Magnus.

**Magnus:** no problem.


	2. Chapter 2

**I forgot to put this in the last chapter, but I put a reference to something in there, and if you can tell me what part of the story it was, and what the reference is, I will give you a pie! **

[music playing]

**Jace:** [singing] I'm a Barbie girl! In a Barbie world! Life's so fantastic! It's made of plastic! You can brush my hair, undress me anywhere!

**Clary:** what are you doing Jace?

**Wolf:** this is weird.

**Jace:** [stops singing] oh, um, I was just, uh…

**Wolf:** just what?

**Jace:** well, you see, i-

**Magnus:** [walks up] what's going on here?

**Jace:** MAGNUS MADE ME!

**Magnus:** excuse me?

**Clary:** he doesn't even know what's going on.

**Wolf:** and why would he want to see you singing Barbie girl?

**Jace:** why wouldn't he want to see me singing Barbie girl?

**Magnus:** because I don't like you Jace. At all.

**Jace:** but everyone likes me.

**Wolf:** actually, I don't like you.

**Jace:** what?

**Wolf:** I mean, your always so mean to Clary and everyone else. I don't see why they like you.

**Magnus:** I know right? He's such a jackass!

**Alec:** he is.

**Isabelle:** ya. He's always dissing my cooking, which happens to be amazing!

**Alec:** *sarcastically* of course it is.

**Jace:** so are all of you here to talk about how much of an ass I am?

**Wolf, Alec, Magnus, Isabelle & Clary:** yes.

**Jace:** I'm feeling very sad and unloved now.

**Simon:** [still in the emo corner] join the club.

**Jace:** [goes to emo corner] nobody loves me!

**Simon:** nobody loves us!

**Isabelle:** Simon, we love. It's just Jace we don't love right now.

**Simon:** YAY! [leaves emo corner] I feel happy now!

**Wolf: **well this has been fun, but I have to go.

**Alec:** where are you going?

**Wolf:** I have some cookies and pies I have to eat.

**Magnus:** you have pies and cookies? Can I have some?

**Wolf:** yes.

**Magnus:** YAY! Thank you! [hugs Wolf]

**Alec:** can I have some cookies and pie too?

**Wolf:** of course you can.

**Alec:** thank you!

**Isabelle:** Alec, I thought you were allergic to cookies!

**Wolf:** why would you think that?

**Isabelle:** last time I tried to bake him cookies he said he was allergic.

**Clary:** and you believed him?

**Isabelle:** [glare]

**Wolf:** I'm gonna go before something blows up. [starts walking away]

**Alec:** I'm coming with you.

**Magnus:** ya, let's go eat the pie.

**Wolf:** see you guys later!

[Magnus, Alec and Wolf run off]

**Clary:** I'm going to go too.

**Simon:** ya.

**Isabelle:** see you guys later.

[Clary, Simon and Isabelle all walk off]

**Jace:** oh, thanks for just leaving me here guys. I can feel the love!


	3. Chapter 3

***ok, so ChinaWolf was the first person to get the reference right. Yay! Here is your pie!***

Jace: everyone run!

Alec: what, why?

Wolf: did you put a bomb in the oven again?

Magnus: that was you.

Wolf: ya, I know…

Jace: no, but Isabelle, she's-

Isabelle: hey guys, come try the cake I just made!

Jace: -cooking.

Clary: oh no.

Isabelle: [walks in room carrying cake] who wants to eat some first?

Jace: its every man for himself! [runs off screaming]

Magnus: ooh, sorry Izzy, I can't eat cake. I'm, er, on a diet.

Isabelle: but Magnus, you're not fat.

Magnus: I know I'm fat, you don't have to rub it in! [fake crying]

Isabelle: I didn't call you fat.

Magnus: why must you torture and tease me about my weight?

Isabelle: um, Magnus, are you like, anorexic or something then?

Magnus: shut up! I'm so fat, just leave me alone about it!

Isabelle: Alec, is he ok?

Alec: no Isabelle. You just had to bring up his weight. He's very sensitive about it.

Magnus: I'm so fat!

Alec: come on Magnus. [leads a still fake crying Magnus out of the room. They then run off to hide away until Isabelle has left the kitchen]

Isabelle: that was really weird.

Clary: ya.

Isabelle: so, who wants cake?

Clary: I'm sorry Izzy, but I'm not hungry right now.

Isabelle: ok, I'll just save you some for later.

Clary: great.

Isabelle: so, Wolf?

Wolf: oh, sure, I'll try a little piece. [takes a small piece of cake and eats it] hm, not too bad.

Isabelle: thanks! [leaves]

Clary: how did you eat that without dying or throwing up?

Wolf: I've had water with a packet of coconut powder, turkey bits, a strawberry, some salt pepper and ranch, bread, pepperonis, cinnamon bun and stale granola bar pieces added to it. I can now eat anything without dying.

Clary: that sounds nasty.

Wolf: it was. One of my friends tried it too, and spit it all on the table.

Clary: icky.

Wolf: ya. And the coconut water was bad enough to start with. [shivers] I will never forget that taste!

***in case you guys have not figured it out, the character Wolf is me, and I actually did drink that stuff mixed up once. It was disgusting!***


	4. Chapter 4

Wolf: OMYGOD!

Clary: what's wrong with you?

Wolf: OMYGOD!

Jace: is she ok?

Wolf: OHMYGOD!

Isabelle: I'm worried now…

Wolf: OHMYGOD!

Simon: should we call the loony bin?

Wolf: OHMYGOD!

Jace: *picks up phone* what's the number?

Wolf: OHMYGOD!

Clary: don't call the loony bin!

Wolf: OHMGOD!

Jace: why not? Look at her. She's clearly suffering from something.

Wolf: OHMYGOD!

Isabelle: Clary's right. Maybe we should let her explain herself. Wolf, what's wrong?

Wolf: OHMYGOD!

Jace: Simon, what's the number?

Simon: I don't know. Why would I have the loony bin's number memorized?

Jace: well, you are dating Isabelle…

Isabelle: hey!

Clary: wait, guys, she stopped.

Magnus: *walks into the room* hey guys.

Alec:*walks in after Magnus* why are you guys all staring at Wolf?

Jace: we're seeing if she's going to do anything while trying to think of what the loony bin's number is.

Magnus: ya, figures YOU would need the loony bin number.

Jace: excuse me?

Wolf: …

Isabelle: Wolf was yelling ohmygod and we can't figure out why.

Alec: did you ask her?

Clary: well, yes, but she just screamed again.

Simon: Wolf, can you tell us what's wrong?

Wolf: …

Isabelle: come on wolf, tell us what's wrong.

Wolf: …

Jace: maybe we should call 911.

Wolf: …

Magnus: Wolf?

Wolf: …

Alec: hey guys, you do know that-

Jace: not now Alec. we are having a crisis.

Alec: Jace, just listen to-

Isabelle: really Alec. we're trying to help a friend and figure out what's wrong with her and you keep inturupting us!

Alec: really guys, I just have to tell you that-

Jace: shut up Alec! we don't want to hear it!

Magnus: don't tell my boyfriend to shut up you jackass!

Isabelle: Wolf, are you ok?

Wolf: …

Jace: you can shut up too.

Magnus: don't tell me to shut up!

Isabelle: both of you shut up!

Wolf: …

Alec: guys, if you would just listen to me-

Simon: Alec, we are still trying to help a friend and you are still not helping.

Wolf: …

Clary: wait, guys, I think she's about to say something.

Wolf: OHMYGOD!

Jace: of course…

Alec: hey, guys-

Clary: please Alec, be quiet.

Wolf: OHMYGOD! *jumps up and falls out of chair*

Isabelle: are you ok?

Wolf: *reaches up and pulls an ear bud out of her ear.* what was that?

Clary: wait, you had headphones in the whole time?

Wolf: um, ya, why?

Alec: I was trying to tell you guys.

Magnus: were you?

Alec: yes. I can't believe you guys didn't notice.

Isabelle: why were you screaming?

Wolf: because I was listening to a playlist that consists of nothing but Anberlin and Adam Lambert, my two favorite musical artists of all time!

Clary: oh.

Jace: so, no loony bin?

Simon: no loony bin.


End file.
